Discipline

Is this what you think when you hear the word "discipline"?  We all need structure and discipline in recovery.  What exactly does that mean for us?  This means the day-to-day performing of tasks whether these are recovery behaviors or washing the dishes or brushing your teeth and taking a shower or showing up for a job interview on time or attending our meetings or doing our step work.

When we are in our addiction, we move far away from normal, healthy day-to-day behaviors because our main priority is feeding our addiction.  When we come into recovery, most (if not all) of us have to relearn these behaviors.  We seem to forget how to plan and organize our day ahead of time, how to be accountable with the simplest things and even how to clean up after ourselves ...  and we end up "flying by the seat of our pants".  Developing discipline helps move us toward feeling capable and confident again in ourselves as worthy, functioning human beings.

It's funny how we "feel" like we ARE being responsible and accountable.  But we must ask ourselves - what is the TRUTH?  We run on our emotions - which lie to us!  It takes us a little while to let go our old belief system because the book tells us we can no longer determine the "true" from the "false".  The uncommon (for a healthy person) has become common to us.

Example:

Sleeping until 5 minutes before I have to fly out the door to catch a bus. Now this seems completely normal to me at first because this is what I have been doing for awhile now. Today, that behavior screams to me: You are living like you lived in your addiction! And the truth is that today, I am not in my addiction - I am sober and must relearn how to live like I am sober and responsible and accountable and worthy of a wonderful life. So while living in a sober house, I get a reminder and if that reminder doesn't spur me into different action, boundaries are set and I get consequences (which I usually don't see as pleasant - or fair - or what I think I deserve .... sound familiar??). 

I can laugh about that today because my behaviors have changed and I am no longer a victim to that addict thinking.  And at the end of the day - the uncommon becomes common to me (again) - but now it's right-side up instead of up-side down.  Yay!!!

One of the beauties of living in a sober environment is that we have models and guides around us. We have rules put in place for a purpose. We have the opportunity to learn from others and model healthy behaviors of those who have been there longer than us. And we get to practice these new behaviors and we get to have consequences if we don't. Consequences always seem to be such great motivators, don't they??

Tell me - how is your discipline today?  Tell me some of your experiences with this -- send me a comment!